.: Cerita Kehidupan :.

Doing two totally different things at the same time is sometimes can be psychotic! This week, I ‘enjoy’ the tense very well. The worst part is, mentally you start to lose your grip. Physically it steals your state of mind. Though I know there are surely has many benefits despite the worst part. But today, let me untangle the worst and the unhealthy parts of being 2-in-1. Work plus study can really make you like a complete idiot. I can feel the symptom of inability to assimilate the daily tasks. Life starts as early as 6.00 am. The morning schedule already takes half of your physical energy. Plus the mental torture of deadlines. Time flies extremely fast. Afternoon doesn’t mean less work. Added with afternoon classes that require equal energy like the morning session (but the truth is your mind get blunt, your back aches, you really need some time to unwind). From time to time you keep reminding yoursef about the unfinished tasks that need to tackle. The tense sometimes shows in your less frequent smiles, focused look and unfriendly chats. Back home, though your mind is refrehed with those unfinished tasks, but your body just prefer the tempting bed and comfy pillows. How am I supposed to be focused when I’m physically strained? So, the evening ends as early as 9.30 pm to reenergise the lost power (and soul). While writing and reading my own schedule,  I realise that whatever it takes, I need to look life in a  simpler and positive way. Life is supposed to be enjoyed. By the way, those hectic and stressfull events were just parts of the episodes in life.

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Labourous and hectic! That describes my weekend schedule for this week. Imagine..lectures from morning to night. Phew! Alhamdulillah.. God blessed me with pink health for these two cram days. Aku terkesan dengan cerita terkini seorang teman yang juga classmate ku ini. Nama dia Yus. Semester lepas, kami satu group untuk paper Leadership. First impression, aku tahu dia ni high-spirited and energetic. Never had the chance to ask her about her personal life. I just assumed that she is a typical housewife with deep interest in furthering her studies. And yesterday, someone told me that she is a widower! Husband dia meninggal in less than a year ago. Oh My! Masa last semester dia masih dalam eddah. Fantastic! Iya..memang aku sungguh terkesan dengan kecekalan dia. Ini satu contoh bahawa cara kita mengendalikan emosi kita akan membezakan kita dari yang lain. Malahan membawa kita lebih ke depan dari yang lain. Yus yang aku kenali ini nampak bersemangat selalu. Mungkin itu syle dia tapi model seperti inilah yang kita harap menjadi perumpamaan jiwa wanita-wanita lain.

Back to lectures. Oh nampaknya aku kena lebih well-prepared kali ini. Initial planning is essential. But stick to yor plan is the key. So, dalam kepala sudah terbentang jalan-jalan yang harus kutempuhi. Moga kesabaran selalu menemani jalan berliku ini. Amin.

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Almost three weeks since the last time I saw my lovely nieces and nephews. And I miss them so much. Their giggles, funny talks and joyous actions will always make me smile. Here is Adam and Ain. The picture was taken quite some time ago. I should update the pictures more often.

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Entah kenapa pulang dari kerja, terasa begitu penat, letih dan tak bermaya. Physically and mentally. Niat di hati mahu mengulangkaji tugasan yang diberi minggu lepas. Namun dengan fizikal dan emosi yang sebegini, bermakna semangat pun hilang. Lepas solat zuhur, sekadar merebahkan badan yang longlai di katil. Fikiran terasa begitu tumpul. Tahap motivasi begitu menurun hari ini. Sekadar mampu mengeluh dan mengelamun.

Aku sudah penat. Melalui perkara yang seakan-akan sama corak perjalanannya. Perjalanan yang berakhir dengan destinasi yang tak pasti. Kalau boleh mahu berhenti dan berpatah balik. Cuba mencari jalan yang lain. Namun bila kusedari telah sepertiga perjalanan berlalu, langkah terbaik cuba menyudahkan dengan fikiran yang positif. Walau hasilnya mungkin hanya sekadar.

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Menganyam selendang kenangan
dari benang ingatan

Selembar sutera kasih
hadiah mimpi yang musnah

Tragedi kehidupan
terungkap dalam benda yang mudah

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